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Chapter ten (epilogue): Strawberry fields forever…
“Congratulations again,” Edward said, handing Jamie a strawberry.
Jamie grinned, accepting the gift. “It wasn’t easy,” he admitted. “But I made it!”
“Dr. Calhoun. I like it!”
Jamie laughed. “I still haven’t gotten used to it yet,” he admitted. “But I think I will in time.”
Edward lay back on the grass, watching as the clouds drifted past. “Remember when we first met?” he asked dreamily.
Jamie snorted. “Of course I do!”
“You didn’t say anything to me,” Edward complained. “I kept waiting for you to say something, but you wouldn’t even look at me!”
“I was trying not to embarrass myself,” Jamie admitted.
Edward flipped over to look at him. He raised an eyebrow curiously. “You were?”
“Of course I was! I had the world’s biggest crush on you.”
“So did I,” Edward confided. “I thought that you didn’t like me.”
“As if.”
“Ah, the naivety of youth,” Edward said. He pulled Jamie down next to him. Jamie twisted to avoid the basket of red fruits, and ended up on top of Edward. “How little we knew then.”
“How much we know now,” Jamie added.
“You do. You’re a Doctor of Philosophy.”
Jamie grinned at that. He suddenly thought of a half-remembered melody, and his mind inserted new words into it. “I’m a Doctor of Philosophy/I’m very very smart. I studied hard for years and years/and now work at Wall-mart.”
Edward burst out laughing. “Where’d you get that?” he demanded.
Jamie shrugged. “One of Estelle’s old plays,” he said. “She thought of the words. I don’t even remember the real ones.”
“Well,” Edward commented. “Those don’t apply to you.”
“Are you implying that I am not very very smart?” Jamie demanded, pushing himself away in mock anger.
“I think you’re brilliant, love,” Edward assured him. “But you don’t work anywhere near a Wall-mart.”
“Good thing, too,” Jamie said tartly. “If I did, then how would I get you through your own doctorate?”
Edward shrugged. “You’d manage. Besides, it’s not as though you’re the only one who brings in money, you know.”
“You’re doing a marvelous job,” Jamie agreed solemnly.
Edward shoved him lightly, though not enough to push him off. “You don’t appreciate me for who I am,” he said soulfully.
“I appreciate you plenty,” Jamie assured him. “But you’re not the primary bread-winner of the partnership.”
“You are slandering me,” Edward said loftily. “I shall not listen to another word that leaves your lips.”
“Not even, ‘I love you’?” Jamie queried, lowering his voice half a step.
“Those, I will consent to receive,” Edward admitted.
Jamie grinned and kissed him. Edward enveloped him in tanned arms, and they held the connection for a long time. When they finally released, Jamie scooted off Edward and lay down next to him. “What do you see in the clouds?’ he asked, watching as the slight breeze buffeted the clouds around.
Edward squinted, staring up into the sky. “I see… a duck.”
Jamie strained his own eyes, but all he could see were round blobs. “How in the world did you manage to see a duck?!”
“See?” Edward asked, sketching out the figure as he spoke. “There’s its head, and that pointed one is the tail, and the feet are sticking down.”
Jamie stared for a moment longer, then shook his head. “Your imagination is more fertile than mine, obviously.”
“It’s like seeing the fat lady riding a pig as England. You just have to know how to look.”
Jamie snorted. “I’ve never been able to see it,” he admitted.
“Remind me to teach you someday.”
“People have tried. My brain doesn’t work that way.”
“Nonsense!” Edward said briskly. “Everyone can learn to see ducks in clouds and crazy pig-riding women in maps. It’s all a matter of looking at it from the right point of view.”
“One that I don’t have.”
Edward rolled his eyes. “So what do you see?” he asked, gesturing up at the sky.
Jamie frowned, trying to think of something to say. “Um… I see a bunch of round things.”
“But what do they look like?” Edward demanded. “‘Round blobs’ doesn’t count, you know.”
Jamie shrugged. “But that’s what I see,” he complained. “Do you want me to lie?”
“No, I want you to engage your imagination,” Edward said in exasperation. “Oh, all right. Let’s make this easy. Take that blob there.” His finger indicated a rather large oblong. “What shape is it?”
“Round and elongated,” Jamie answered.
“Good. What else is round and elongated that you can think of.”
“Those tube pillows,” Jamie said after a moment’s thought.
“That the best you can think of?” Edward asked.
Jamie nodded.
“Right. So, does the cloud look like a pillow?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because it isn’t in three dimensions,” Jamie answered. “It’s more like a picture of a pillow.”
“There you have it!” Edward said triumphantly. “You saw something in the clouds!”
Jamie rolled his eyes. “If you say so,” he agreed dubiously. “I still think that my brain isn’t wired for that.”
“Everyone’s is,” Edward said again.
Jamie continued to look at the clouds, absently admiring the puffy white perfection. How could they stay such a pure white with all the pollution in the world? It was like there was a kind of magic that enabled the clouds to purify themselves and stay that same dazzling white. As he watched, he drifted once again into that sleepy-trancelike state. His vision sharpened and he suddenly could see Edward’s duck. To his bliss-drugged mind, he saw the duck split apart and become two pieces of a broken heart. The two pieces that had once been Jamie and Edward.
He watched as the two pieces drifted closer together, brushing each other and then recoiling. He winced at that, but continued to watch the aerial drama. The two pieces, gradually breaking apart, continued to stay away, and Jamie wondered if that was how it ended. Was the rest just a dream? But then one of the crumbling halves reach out and touched the other tentatively. As he watched, they welded together again, mending themselves as they did so. As one, they obliterated the dark patches and clung together. He saw the holes that were still there gradually begin to fill in, and knew that there were many more. Neither he nor Edward were completely healed yet, but whatever happened, they would do it together. He smiled.
“Jamie?” Edward asked, brushing his hand lightly. “Are you there?”
Jamie shifted closer. “Of course I am,” he whispered. “I’m always with you.”
The tone of Edward’s voice changed as he answered, “So am I.”
Jamie reached over and drew Edward close, touching his mouth to his. As Edward responded, Jamie closed his eyes. Everything would be all right now. They would always be together, and everything would be all right.
fin |
